I Love You Dad

My parents were divorced when I was 12, with the judge's decision that I will go with my mom and my 7-year-old little sister will go with my dad. Because I go with mom, the explanations that I got is an opposing opinion to my dad. My mom told me if my dad was unemployed, causing our family spoor, and he isn't loving our family. Not long after that, my mom had a relationship with a rich guy even though it didn't last long, cuz the guy refused to marry my mom. Time flies, and my mom keep being single until finally decided to get back together again with my dad when I was in Highschool

Even though I'm not hating my father as my mom did before, the relationship that happened between us was just a regular dad-son awkwardness. We don't talk much and only speak necessary. The daily communication that only happens between us is when I arrived at home after school. In the evening in the living room he just sat on a couch, waiting for me to get inside the room only for asking 'Is it raining/rainy? son'. The duration and variety of our communication just depend on whether that day is raining or not. Im gonna answer 'Yes it's rainy/ just drizzle/ no it is not raining/ I can see the dark clouds coming, etc.' He then will replied shortly just saying 'hmmm/okay/alright'. Then I will go into my room to do my things and we never talked again till tomorrow evening when I arrived at home after school again and again over the years. 

Just FYI. the distance from my school to home is 10km (6 miles) and I traveled by motorcycle that I bought by my own money. Since my parents were divorced, during junior high school, I've been earning my own money by doing some digital design and selling some caricatures of people's faces. Although my dad was working as a big truck driver, I rarely asked for money from him or my mom.

Time flies and I graduated from high school, go to college, and graduated from graphic design majors. Then I worked in the capital city as a graphic designer for a digital printing company and decided to live by myself. The relations that happened between me and my dad became more and more estranged until I was married and had a child. I love my family so much especially my son that made me question how my dad feels to me and his family. I even often asked my wife and my mom what kind of conversation can be had with Dad.

Until there came a day when my dad suddenly suffered a stroke and died 3 weeks later in the hospital. Even though we're not that close, it actually makes me very sad cuz I'd never had a chance to get close to him. My mom also confessed to me the reason for their past divorce is my mom was caught cheating on that rich guy, my dad was a good man and always work real hard. At that time when they divorced, my dad still loves our family so much, he never has a relationship with another woman and keeps sending money to my mom to support my life. He also always tried to get close to me after we back together, but I never understand it and always ignore him.

One thing that always made me tear up is knowing a story that I almost forget happened when I was in middle school. That time I was ordered by my sister to draw a caricature of my own face. Although I feel kind of strange cuz usually people order me to draw their own face, my sister refused to explain the reason why and I didn't much think about it. I realized after my dad passed away, when I was entering his bedroom for the first time to clean up his stuff, right on the wall facing into his bed, there is a caricature picture of me that I'd drawn years ago. It is placed in a nice frame in a very clean condition, my sister then explain to me that dad always takes care of that picture by himself and always proud of me. 

Now the only thing that I can do is give more love and care to my family. For all people that still have dad on yout side, don't forget to take care of him.


And for my dad...

You're the best dad...

Forever in my heart...

I love you so much...

RIP dad...




Inspired by : Arif Brata - Indonesian Comedian life story

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