A Call to Quit
A
Call to Quit
Seeing that his
audiences were becoming smaller every Sunday, a Minister of the Gospel broke
off in the midst of a sermon, descended the pulpit stairs, and walked on his
hands down the central aisle of the church. He then remounted his feet,
ascended to the pulpit, and resumed his discourse, making no allusion to the
incident. “Now,” said he to himself, as he went home, “I shall have, henceforth,
a large attendance and no snoring.” But on the following Friday he was waited
upon by the Pillars of the Church, who informed him that in order to be in
harmony with the New Theology and get full advantage of modern methods of
Gospel interpretation they had deemed it advisable to make a change. They
had therefore sent a call to Brother Jowjeetum-Fallal, the World-Renowned
Hindoo Human Pin-Wheel, then holding forth in Hoopitup’s circus. They
were happy to say that the reverend gentleman had been moved by the Spirit to
accept the call, and on the ensuing Sabbath would break the bread of life for
the brethren or break his neck in the attempt.
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