Cyber Jealousy - part 1

My worst school experience happened in the second grade of junior high school. I would call it a bully that does not hurt me physically but rather affects me mentally and psychologically. 

I joined a robotics club in first grade, which made me meet my team, which also became my best friend. We were a group of three: two boys and one girl (I'm one of the boys). We were in the same grade, but we were separated into different classes.

In my robotic club, we compete in the annual robotic national competition, but before that, our club holds its own internal competition, in which the teams are divided by grade. So there will be my team, the team of the first grade, the team of the second grade, and the team of the third grade.

The teachers explained that there is an annual tradition inside this club, explaining what each grade team must do every year.

The first year is just chilling and learning from their seniors. They must prepare their team because in the next year, their team must become national champions. The second year focuses on competition. The third-year team teaches their juniors about their experience in competition. 

This cycle is in purpose to maintain the club activity stay healthy because the third year must focus on final exam, the first year is still new, and the second year is the most deserved candidates to go into national competition.

Long story short, we're in the second year and must go into a national competition. My team made a successful innovation showed in amazing result in our robotic performance while compete in school club.

This creates rejection from our seniors because they think, we must stay intact into the old formula that they've developed before. Because the third grade think that something new like this is too much risky.

The third grade said if all of the teams in the national are still developing the old formula, so we must do the same thing. But we quietly reject it and sneak our formula into the national competition.

And as our calculation, it's shows better result bringing our team into the second position in national competition. A history that our robotic club never could achieved before and made my team name well known in school.

But without our knowing, that was the beginning of the terror of our downfall. The beginning of the first incident is happened to me.

One night, there was a Facebook account using my name as a disguise, doing a mass chat with multiple girls asking to have sexual intercourse and sending pictures of male genitals which not mine. The one girl that also in my robotic team also got the chat and the one who told me about this in the first place that same night.

She knew which one was my real account and that is not me the one who had done it, because in the same time we're also doing an online study together. After knowing this, I immediately changing my account name and making a clarification statement that can only be seen by my friends only, saying wich one is my real and the one fake account who make all of the chaos.

I'm not posting it to the full public because I'm afraid that my parents or teacher will know about this and it will make me in more trouble. I'm just a calm introverted nerd boy who is not brave enough to make a breakthrough.

The next day, I knew that the rumors already spread like wildfire. I also realized that my clarification post doesn't have any affect on my situation. 

When I arrived at school so many students looked at me from the distance with disgust. They look at me like trash, mocking expression, and no one talk to me not even my closest class mate. 

I can hear the mumbling they laughing and whispering judging my everything; appearance, attitude, even my family with swear words such as mocking words, etc. I still remember that feeling of uncomfortable drowning in desperation, confusion, uneasiness, and misery. Ever since that morning I want to scream out my right but I can't, it makes me wanna throw up every time I remember it. 

I would call it fortunately because the rumors only happened between students, so no teacher nor my parents knew about it. I don't know are the teachers already knew it but they decided to keep it lowkey because of my parents is a famous local judge.

The reason that made me survive is my robotic team who always believes in me. I also realize that my parents love me so much and keep supporting me in my hobbies.

The second cyberbully happened two weeks after my first incident. By that time, the students had stopped talking about me but they still avoiding me. The one who still talk to me is my 2 friends from roboric club, one boy and one girl.

One night, a one girl that in my robotic team texted me, she ask me to check the online form of the robotic club application, because Im the one who holds the club's email account. 

There was one submission on that day and it was in the name of her. The filling of the form is many obscene words that lead to weird and absurd fetish such as I love BD5M, want to be rap3d, want to do public s3x, love to masturbate while eating sh!ts, etc.

Continue to read part 2 here

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